3 Monkeys and a Football

Season #3, Episode 1

2011-03-15T13:52:00.003-04:00

Season 3, Episode #1

The boys are finally back! After a lengthy hiatus (11 months), the Monkeys reconvene to take care of business. Back in the studio is one of our most popular guests, Pauly Taco. Mr Taco, visiting Ohio to favor us locals with some authentic Mexican fare, did not let us down in either the studio or the feeding table. Listen in as the fellas shake off the rust and jump back into the topics such as: Gill's bowel updates, Pauly's world travels, cell phone etiquette, and the ever-popular "crapping the alphabet" segment. This show was taped in front of a raucous live studio audience (all three of them). Please excuse the poor audio quality (even worse than usual) *Anyone that would like to donate money for us to purchase actual recording equipment, we'll gladly take it. Like I said, we're trying to get back into the swing of things.

(picture at left) Pauly Taco, post-show, working with mortar and pestle while preparing food for the night of "discada"...followed by the night of "destroying your bathroom"
Finally, please send us your emails...
3monkeysandafootball@gmail.com

Late-Night Bonus

2010-04-04T10:57:00.002-04:00

For Platinum Members Only:
A guitar, a late night, and 6 guys with bellies full of frothy ale...a recipe for history or disaster. One might find this posting enjoyable. One might find it quite troubling. You must judge for yourself.

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Season 2, Episode #5

2010-04-04T10:48:00.003-04:00

A special guest in the studio this night...our farthest traveling guest...the CBC (Chief Beer Correspondent) himself, Ove!
Ove brings his expansive knowledge of all things beer to the 3 Monkeys show as he sheds some light on some of beer's deepest secrets. He expands the minds of the cheap beer/30 pack swilling hosts as he offers up some interesting new tastes and styles.
Episode #5 is also a landmark edition because it features our first "musical" guest (due to some audio problems in the booth). Yes, Gill dons the 6 string and fires off some captivating lead-in music, much to the delight of the crowd.
Also in the studio (does this magical night ever slow down? No!) repeat guest Rosey and "The Mean One" (who takes the opportunity to announce himself early in the show...but prefers to be in the background)

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Season 2, Episode #4

2010-02-24T22:37:00.006-05:00

We welcome the Monkeys back from a long winter's nap. Exhausted after their recent interview with professional wrestler, Joey Conquest, the boys hibernated a bit before waking up, stretching, and walking out of the den and into the Bird's Nest Studios.
*The picture to the right shows what the 3 Monkeys looked like during one of their breaks back in the late 60s.
This episode is a landmark show because there was zero preparation, no notes, no wonderful introductions, and no discussion of what they were going to talk about...which amazingly, sounds like all of their other shows.
Episode #4 of season 2 contains the ever-popular Listener Email segment as well as J-Bird's music lyric quiz (which Gill absolutely tanked). They also discuss the Olympics and their collective love for curling and hatred for ice dancing. And finally, they cap the night off by undoubtedly pissing off their wives to the point where they may never be allowed to do a show again...and who says that is a bad thing?

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Season 2, Episode #3

2009-12-19T00:37:00.002-05:00

We welcome to the studio a longtime friend of all the Monkeys, local proprietor of fun and spirits, and former professional wrestler: Joey Conquest!
Listen in as we hear from him about his famous past. We also answer listener email, hear from Gill and his weekly trivia and Jake as he gives us a little Christmas trivia.

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Season 2, Episode #2

2009-11-09T09:09:00.002-05:00

Special guest: "Big" Al. Gill's Olympic trivia, favorite board games, and the worst/most uncomfortable final 15 minutes in show history, backing up the theory that exposure to large quantities of ale before the show leads to a sudden "tapering-off". Delicate ears should exercise caution.

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Season 2, Episode #1

2009-11-01T09:10:00.004-05:00

First show of the second season! Songs NOT to play at your wedding, Gill's Weekly Trivia, and much much more.

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After a critically acclaimed first season, the boys are back for the first time since the summer break as they embark on Season #2.

Refreshed? Invigorated? Poised? Incredibly stupid? You're gawddamn right!

Now that they are back at it, you can look forward to more regular updates. With that, they desperately want/need your feedback. Got a gripe? Want to comment? Do you feel like you want to tell them their show sucks? Then please feel free to write to them at 3monkeysandafootball@gmail.com. They read all mail and back down from nobody...except for that little old lady from Iowa who once wrote, "You guys suck! The audio quality is horrid. Your topics are childish. Your delivery is unprofessional. You sound like your entire purpose for doing a show is so you can get together and drink. Edward R. Murrow is rolling in his grave. Now that is a broadcaster. Why, back in my day we had to walk to school in our bare feet...." Well, you get the picture.

Season 1, Episode #12

2009-06-28T21:02:00.006-04:00

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The boys are finally back from a short vacation. They feature the music of Michael Jackson (while not celebrating his pedophilia) Also, a fantastic report filed by our Chief Beer Correspondent as well as many of the other features that keep you wondering why you keep coming back. Finally, if you look at the photo closely, you'll notice the incredibly handsome attire sported by the Monkeys, featuring the new logo. Do you want to be the coolest guy at the bar? Do you want to be the envy of all your roomies in Cell Block D? Do you want women to instantly discount any endearing qualities you may have actually exhibited? Well then, you need this shirt! Check back as we try to figure out how we can underpay foreign children to make us more so we can sell them.

We welcome your comments, questions, or suggestions. Feel free to email us at 3monkeysandafootball@gmail.com

The World Waits Anxiously For Latest Podcast Update!

2009-06-19T09:27:00.006-04:00

Hello faithful listeners! At this point, you've probably convinced yourself that the podcast that you have come so addicted to is nothing but an after-thought. But alas, you're wrong once again.
The staff of 3 Monkeys and a Football have been on a short sabbatical for the months of May and June. Hey, let's be honest, few humans can keep up the torrid pace we jumped out of the gate with. Amazing is the fact that we were able, week after week, to come up with such enlightening topics dealing with belching, drinking, and Top 5 Lists and yet keep it fresh. In the early days of the establishment of our fair podcast, one of our driving mottos was, "If we're going to do dick jokes, fart noises, and interview widely-unknown guests...then we must commit to bringing our listeners only the best"
Jake is finishing the final leg of his whirlwind banquet speaking tour. He's managed to offend nearly all of those in attendance...much like our podcast. Gill is wrapping up a temporary job as "Design Coordinator" in charge of khaki pants and cargo shorts at the Chico's factory. And J-Bird has been working around the clock to procure some of the most talented guests for future shows. Naturally, nobody has signed on...YET!
So keep checking back. A new show is being planned at this moment for a date in early July. Also...please keep emailing us as 3monkeysandafootball@gmail.com. Your emails are the wind beneath our proverbial wings....fly....Fly.....FFFFLLLYYY AWAY!
Oh...and keep track of us on Facebook too!

Vacation...but we'll be back!

2009-04-30T13:43:00.005-04:00

The 3 Monkeys will be taking the week off to collect their thoughts and to allow the entire production staff to regroup.

Jake will undoubtedly be looking for new ways to use WD-40, Gill will spend the week searching online for new khakis, and J-Bird will still be attempting to write great introductions..and still failing.

For those of you that are into Facebook, 3 Monkeys and a Football has created a "group" on the popular social networking site. Simply go to the search field and type the name of our fair show. Join our group and you will be treated to the same lackluster media you've come to expect from us.

Rest assured knowing that we will be back next week reinvigorated and ready to bring you the high-quality banter that you've come to expect from a podcast as professional as ours.

Speaking of professional, I'd like to share a pic one of our listeners, Mr. George Dickel, sent to us. He said it reminded him of the on-air talent of 3 Monkeys and a Football.

Thanks...and be sure to email us at 3monkeysandafootball@gmail.com

Season 1, Episode #11

2009-04-18T21:15:00.002-04:00

Our first repeat guest, Dr. Hawk. Also in the studio the man we now call "Logo". A great call-in from our Chief Beer Correspondent, Greatest sports upsets, Things We'd Like to See, and much much more!

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Bonus: After Hours Episode #11-A

2009-04-18T20:47:00.001-04:00

A little late-night wind down.

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Season 1, Episode #10

2009-04-06T10:53:00.010-04:00

WARNING -- Not your normal episode
Listener Discretion is advised

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Unedited - Uncut
If you're sick and tired of the normal, award-winning, precisely-timed format of the earlier shows, then this episode is for you! Pauly Taco spent an entire week at the Bird's Nest Studios just to tape a second episode. No listener emails, no Top 5 lists, no-limits! Just rapid-fire nonsense. What you can count on is what many believe is a modern-day record for the largest amount of Schlitz ever consumed by 4 men in about an hour.

The topics come at you in a blur. So sit back and listen closely to what is sure to be labeled an "instant classic"

Season 1, Episode #9

2009-03-28T11:02:00.003-04:00

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First report from our CBC (Chief Beer Correspondent), Pauly Taco in Studio!, Wrestling Trivia, Top 5 Earning Dead Celebrities, general what-not.

Season 1, Episode 8

2009-03-14T10:15:00.005-04:00

Exciting announcement of two additions to the Monkey Staff, Irish Trivia, More Friday the 13th facts, #2 Euphemisms and so much more!

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Season 1, Episode 7

2009-03-06T00:30:00.007-05:00

More email, Hole in One!, colloquialisms, drinking games, WD-40 and much more!

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Season 1, Episode 6

2009-02-21T11:17:00.004-05:00

More listener email, Special Guest, Top 5 Cartoons, Who'd you Rather, and much much more. Told you it was a big rat!

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Season 1, Episode 5

2009-02-14T10:05:00.004-05:00

Listener Emails, Top 5 Vacation/Party spot, Special Guest: a chemist, drinking countries, Spam, Spam, Spam and more!

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Season 1, Episode 4

2009-02-07T16:33:00.002-05:00

1st International email, Top 5 TV shows, Special guest, Most ticketed cars, and more.

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Season 1, Episode 3

2009-02-02T17:38:00.001-05:00

First celebrity interview, reader emails, Top 5 Movies

Friday January 30, 2009

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Season 1_Episode_2

2009-01-24T00:16:00.002-05:00

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Season 1 Episode 1

2009-01-15T21:41:00.001-05:00

Season 1, Episode 1